i swear to sidekiq if more ppl follow me and don’t interact with me i’m gonna have to purge my list. it feels too vulnerable. i write about my health and history under followers-only and it feels bad to give someone access to something relatively private and never hear from them again


@mood I apologize—I try not to cross folks’ boundaries and just give them space but more often than not that means I’m just sitting here being quiet 😞

@mood Also this is not at all intended to push anything back on you, sorry! I am just reflecting on how I could do better

@zigg oh no apology needed 💜 for the like 40 or so folks who regularly see me liking posts and we interact — even if it’s once in a blue moon — don’t worry a bit.

it’s the majority who have truly, for real, never so much as faved something in passing, that make me increasingly worried

@mood Thank you ☺️

The majority thing is totally fair and regrettably familiar—over the years that group has made me anxious more than once and led me to self-censor, not least because I have had a handful of bad experiences with vulnerable posts I’ve made in the past.

@mood @zigg How do you track this? Is it a feeling or are you poking the db?

@pagrus @zigg it’s a feeling, and then in the UI for managing followers, i can at least remove dormant and moved accounts (housekeeping)—which honestly will remove maybe a hundred of those “why are you following me?!” things

it’s also getting periodic waves of new requests, and then not hearing from those people ever. they’re fresher in my mind. so i notice if a few weeks pass with zero anything beyond the initial request

@mood @pagrus @zigg I keep wanting to make a little deno script that pulls my activity history and points at the folks who don’t interact with me so I can unfollow/remove them from my follows.

@mood @pagrus @zigg I declared follow bankruptcy on Twitter and Facebook a while back; and it was very nice.

@zee @pagrus @zigg twitter had a good tool for finding people whose linkages to ones account were, let’s say, superficial— before twitter maimed their API, of course

@zee @pagrus @zigg i suppose more accurately i should’ve written — [someone made something for] twitter

@mood @zigg That really ought to be a feature. Could be like a heatmap or something

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Queer Garden

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