Pinned toot

I forgot the word spine today and instead said 'bone rope' in front of all of my work colleagues

Pinned toot

Lewd? Show more

Pinned toot

i assert my dominance over social situations by opening beer bottles in increasingly improbable ways

Pinned toot

I carry way too much aggressive energy for someone who is afraid of confrontation

A healthy relationship is chasing my gf on all fours at Full Speed through the apt

Nervous boosted

Selfie, ec, boosts+, mh+ Show more

Nervous boosted

Selfie, ec, boosts+, mh+ Show more

Hey!
If I forget to cw something! Please tell me!
I will 100% fix it right away
I use a lot of other platforms that don't have a cw function so it frequently falls off my radar if I'm just senselessly posting
Sorry for any inconveniences!

Just to clarify
I'm constantly deeply anxious
But my distinct lack of self control completely over rides that
So I just
Do dumb shit
Like oh I don't know
get a tattoo
Anyways
Because my sense of Fuck It overrides all

Adults who drink milk don't deserve rights

My girlfriend is losing her mind
Bc she saw my list of baby names
And knows I fuckin love babies
Little does she know
The list is for an armadillo

Beetles? The bomb.com!
Lepidoptera? Perfection! My wife is one!
Arthropods? Splendid!
Phasmids? Look at them go!
Flies? So cool!
Hymenoptera? Hell yeah!
True Bugs! Absolutely fucking Brilliant!

Especially insects and terrestrial arthropods, those guys are my specialty

If you have any questions about animals please ask me
I need to flex my animal knowledge so I can prove to myself that my degree isn't useless

Fun disability reminder @ peeps I've interacted with irl and in verbal/video bade platforms Show more

Nervous boosted

This is the universe telling me to shut the fuck up for once

Nervous boosted
Show more
Queer Garden

A mastodon instance geared towards queer people and their allies.